Vol. I · No. 014 The Masthead Est. 2025
DIY GUIDE
▸ who files these reports

About The Dispatch

DIY Guide is the honest male-toy dispatch. I spent the better part of a decade on the inside of this industry — the part where you see the returns, hear the complaints, and learn what the marketing quietly leaves out.

Most reviews talk about how a toy feels and stop there. We don't. Every report here covers the part that actually decides whether you'll keep using it: the cleanup, the maintenance, the real cost per use, and an honest answer to whether you should buy it at all — including cheaper or easier alternatives, even when there's an affiliate link on the line.

The Rules

No paid placements. Affiliate links help keep the lights on, but they never change a verdict. If something's overpriced or overhyped, you'll read it here first.

No shame. This is a normal consumer product. We treat it like one.

No pretending. I haven't tested every toy ever made, and I'll tell you when I'm reasoning from experience versus hands-on use.